TW : Rape
One of the most common question we hear when we talk about sexual violence and rape is “Why didn’t she report it immediately to the police?“. Like if it was obvious. Well, if someone hit you with a baseball bat to take your wallet you will report it. If someone punch you to steal your mobile phone you will report it. Why won’t you report it if you are raped?
Well, first of all, I am pretty sure you never ever wonder if the victim of a pickpocket had large pockets that could make it easier for the pickpocket to take the wallet.
You would never ever wonder if the victim who has been punched and stolen did not provoke the assailant by giving a call and showing he/she had a phone and just asked for being taken.
Here a short video just in case you still don’t know what I mean.
Rape is the only crime where the victims are blamed for what happened to them.
You think this is exaggerated? That we live in a society that support rapes victims and condemn rapists?
Well, let me tell you my experience. As a victim who reported a rape to the police years after it occurred I think I have a valid opinion.
So, briefly, I did not report immediately because :
1 -I could not speak. I mean physically. I could not speak.
2 – I froze and dissociate
3 – I could not name what happened. It was not the fisrt time I was assaulted and I always I was mocked and laughed at for the abuses.
Eventually, after long years of struggle, I found the strength to report. These were the consequences:
1 – I lost my job because I was givind a “bad impression”.
2 – I lost “friends”
3 -I received tons of horrid comments